No gloves. Nothing else.

On Lincoln Memorial looking south to downtown Milwaukee.

Gary lost his wife on October 21st. He was a carpenter most of his life. He ran his own business. He’s used to paperwork.

“This end of life stuff ... the system sits on its ass.” he said.
He’s pretty matter-of-fact about it. I think he’s still in shock.

I told him it took a year and a half to go through probate with my dad’s little estate.

“She was 58. On dialysis the last year. Went pretty fast. We planned and saved. We were going to see the world. Now all that money’s sitting there. For what?”

I told him that I met the hospice nurse in the shuttle. She and I both lost a brother a year ago October.

“October sounds like a popular month.” he said.

They were going to see the world. Now he has a hard time doing the laundry and washing the dishes.

“Don’t wait,” he said, “do what you’re going to do.”

“Thanks,” I said, “I’ll remind my wife.”
Timeless advice.

.....

Cold as heck that day, it was Rosemary’s first outing since the surgery two weeks earlier.
“I picked a heck of a day, didn’t I?” Cold. Very cold. Windy.

She had something done on her left leg. Hip, knee, ankle. I didn’t ask. She’s using a cane. We walked arm in arm. Slowly. I carried her purse. I braced her right foot while she hoisted herself into the van. It’s a surprisingly high vehicle sometimes.

She knows her car is staying overnight. She’s got friends and neighbors to fetch her the necessaries. She was going to make a soup later. Beef vegetable.

I told her I made a root vegetable soup and was disappointed with the flat flavor. What meat did I use? None. Oh. That was probably my problem. She doesn’t use any herbs and spices either. She might have called them fancy. Salt and pepper. That’s it.

I’m sure she made a fine soup.

.....

Cloudy, overcast and 16 degrees, I drove Brad to Northwestern Mutual.
He was dressed in a medium-weight jacket. No gloves. Nothing else.

It was startling. Remarkable. So, I remarked.

“No gloves?” I asked.
“They’re in the car.” he said. (Which we just left in the shop.)
I did not mention anything about a hat. Who am I - his mother?

The remarkable part was that he was not carrying anything at all.
No book, bag, briefcase or beverage. He was not fondling his phone.

As much as we Americans might like to think and talk about our freedom so many of us are chronically weighted down with stuff.

No gloves. Nothing else.

He looked free.

Remarkable.