What pleases you

What pleases you? 

It could be a question or it could be a command fragment. It might be other things. Do what pleases you as soon as is possible. For as long as possible. Your brain will love you for it. Your brain and therefore the rest of you, too.

Today is the day after I wrote about Mark, the Marine vet that’s watching over his blind, 94 year old mother, guess who boarded the shuttle? Ruth.

Ruth has been in nursing for 25 years and specializing at the Neurosciences Center at Froedtert Hospital for the last six years. She specializes in caring for people with memory disorders due to stroke and Alzheimer’s. Endlessly fascinating.

Mostly we talked about caregivers not getting enough care on their own and the very wide gap in services specific to having too much in the way of assets in order to get help. You can be poor and get a reasonably fine quality of assistance but if you have a little too much you don't get any help at all. I did tell her about the number of people that I meet who are doing these things and how often this is spoken of in this shuttle space.

Help at Interfaith.

And so she said she has a friend whose husband retired and he was looking for a little something to do and her friend was also going to retire in a year and wondered what to do and Ruth says it is best to do what pleases you; neurologically best.

Do what pleases you as soon as you can. The people that retire early are most at risk for cognitive degeneration. The people who are angry, negative, and pessimistic are at most at risk for brain disorders. The people who are happy and busy and engaged have a better chance of long-term brain health.

I did tell her about Jeanette that I met yesterday; 87, driving, cooking, baking and winning big at bingo. Go Jeanette.

And we’ve all heard it before … but it sounds so much more real coming from a real practitioner in a face-to-face place that is delivered in a non-stressful way. In other words, it’s not too late for me to hear about me … just saying’.

Ruth was telling her friend who is going to retire soon that she met a guy who's been doing things right … or maybe she met somebody from the dealership who's active and retired and has a job and is writing books. Ruth is not quite sure.

"I think that might be me you’re talking about.” I said.

Yes: brain games, puzzles, music, socialization, yoga, but most specifically more general exercise. More for the body. It is not all about the mind.

This ‘do what pleases you' reminds me of the heart/brain specialist at the VA who said that reducing as much stress as possible (naturally) will add to the quality and quantity of your days.

And this also speaks to a recent second favorite book; The Power of Full Engagement by James Loehr. Loehr is a sports psychologist consulting on peak performance.

Hard work? Yes. Play and rest, too? Yes, absolutely. Without the full spectrum of work, play and rest there is no peak performance.

Mind you …let’s not start meditating just because management says it’s good for the minions. And let us not wait for retirement. Let us move toward the joy … now.

Less stress. More fun. On purpose. For you. Yes, you.

Interfaith Milwaukee

I had been telling a few people that they might have some options as care-givers for themselves and their charges. It occurred to me that I should ask about it locally before continuing with that assumption.

I posted a request on the Interfaith Facebook page and got an invitation to call and a thank you for spreading the word.

lnterfaith has a Family Caregiver Support Network that is open to area residents. Whether the person is the person receiving or giving care. Call 414-220-8600 Monday-Friday, 8:30-4:30.

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InterfaithMilw.org

CaregiverSupportNetwork.org

Living-Options.org

WisconsinCaregiver.org

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/interfaithmilw

Veterans Day Care Giver

Mark was a marine for quite some time and on disability. His spine is turning into a sponge. Spongio-something. He also must have had some neck fusion surgery because it takes his entire torso to turn his head.

“You know, you just never think these things will turn out that way.” he said.

We talked about his service a little bit. He knows I understand that most folks don’t get it. I told him that I did not serve and yet we were able to find agreements.

And he's the sole caregiver for his mother while living in her house. She is 94 now and blind. I can tell he doesn’t like being away even while his car is in for service.

So I mentioned Dry Hooch on Brady and the vet center cafe in the building up at 35th and Wisconsin, is it? He was aware of it and hopes they stay open. It doesn’t seem like he has a mind to visit them. Maybe someday. He knows he needs to get out and stretch his legs and get away from the situation. He needs a caregiver for himself.

I tell him the story of Bernie and Patty, two people I met in similar situations, just a couple weeks ago. 

He thinks the only care for his mother is $200 a day for people who do everything. I’m talking about him getting his own butt out the door a few times a week. I should actually check it out so I know more about it. 

Later that day a fellow employee asks me if it’s alright if we have a chat some time so that she can get some honest input about a life situation. It doesn’t seem like a situation I have much experience in. Apparently I have the right stuff.

Now if I can just follow through and find out what kinds of services are available in the metro area. I need to speak with greater authority.

Tanzanian Ambassador Mudri

In the 80’s Mr. Mudri’s sister married a guy from Uganda. When Idi Amin, evil ruler of Uganda, was practicing genocide they escaped to America via churches that were taking in refugees. His sister later sponsored his arrival in the States. He’s been here about 30 years.

For a good while he had a grocery store at 12th and Vliet Street. A good while was over the day he was robbed at gunpoint and locked in the walk-in cooler.

He said something about cooking for one and I mentioned the senior centers around the county. His family is now all gone but he has his own community at his mosque.  We had just passed the mosque at 13th and Layton. He is not a member there. They are Sunnis. He is a Shia Muslim. And, he is not one of those Shia Muslims; the ones that famously kill people. He does not understand them either and is sad about the damage they are doing to the good name.

I said I was pretty much a Christian and there are many branches. 

“Are there branches in Islam?” I asked.

“Seventy-three” he said. “The main split is Sunni/Shia but they all have their own schools, branches, and beliefs.

He said 73 so quickly it seemed as though he had just been reading up on it. I don’t doubt him and do not care to count that high myself.

Speaking of counting … I stopped listing the countries after I hit 50. I have them all on my recorder but do not take time as often as I would like. I might be up to 55 by now. Tanzania is a new one on me and Mr. Mudri is a fine ambassador.

I should like to have a coffee with him someday.